The more things change...

I think all of you will be glad to know that The South is still The South. Yesterday in Marion, Alabama two families escalated their years-old feud into "'[...] a full-scale riot [...]'" involving up to 150 people (though other reports put this number closer to 300) and leading to eight arrests and two hospitalizations. The major source of the feud is unknown, but the the day of the riot two members of the involved families were arrested at the local high school for fighting. After these arrests, family members followed the police to city hall, where the riot erupted. According to a police sergeant, people were "'throwing jack irons, throwing tire irons, anything they could get their hands on.'" Maybe the funniest line of the AP blurb: " The town's police chief was hit in the head with a crowbar but was OK."

The Grangerfords and Shepherdsons would be proud, though none were killed in Marion.

Fucking weak.

Students at two elementary schools in California will, because of a clerical error and strict laws regarding the length of school days, be forced to complete 34 extra days of school this summer. An associate superintendent, who has now conveniently decided to retire, mistakenly allowed the schools to have short days during the school year that were only 170 or 175 minutes, below the required 180 minute threshold that defines a school day in the state. The law is so strict that these 170 or 175 minute days, typically shortened to allow teachers more time to prepare lessons, do not count as even partial school days, meaning that if the schools hope to receive their usual amounts of state funding next fall the students must complete 34 additional at-least-180-minute days of school before starting summer vacation.

"Fourth-grader Sean Cornish says his classmates 'think it's dumb that they have to go to school for these extra days because some lady messed up.'" I agree, and also cannot believe the state laws do not allow the schools to make up only the missed time, rather than the number of days that were too short.

Stupid people.

• Sony Pictures Entertainment CEO Michael Lynton announced that Internet is pure evil. More specifically he said, “I’m a guy who doesn’t see anything good having come from the Internet. Period.”
• Florida prison guards, in an apparent effort to keep the retirees happy and the children docile, stun-gunned 43 children last week during ''Take Your Sons and Daughters to Work Day.'' Three prisons stun-gunned children while another facility chose to tear-gas them instead. Three firings, two resignations, and sixteen disciplinary actions have resulted so far.
• The National Inquirer is stopping to (possibly?) new lows. A freelance writer working for The Inquirer checked Brooke Shield’s demented mother out of her nursing home and drove her around hoping to prompt the confused woman to tell a juicy secret of her daughter’s.
• Two Yellowstone Park workers were fired after a web cam caught them peeing into a geyser. They also face charges.

Talk about a bad year for Republicans...

Losing the presidency sucks, but it happens fairly regularly for each major party; losing ground in the House and Senate also sucks, but also has precedent and should not be too painful. The losses that hurt the most (in terms of confidence and mood, not political influence) are the ones like this, where a "teenybopper" takes an elected position from your party.